Chapter 2.6

Hi! Welcome back to Herping and Derping! I’m releasing this chapter because you people kept begging I’m temporarily tearing myself away from Skyrim. XD

Also Khajiits are awesome and the Skyrim Tumblr community scares me.
Let’s jump on in.

When we last left off, the family had adopted this cute little puppy named Bear, and Dutchman had taken quite the liking to him.

In fact, I think she likes him better than Cuddles.
Whether or not that statement means she likes him better than Cuddles likes him or she actually likes him better than she likes Cuddles is something I’ll leave for you folks to decide. 😉

Potential BFFs?

We’ll have to wait and see. 😀

Stu gets love too, but I forget about him because he doesn’t romp around the house being super cute like Bear does.

Man, this family. All of these interfamilial feuds and whatnot.

Dutchman: Urg, my phone is ringing and it’s making me nauseous.
Yeah, that’s not what this is about.
Cuddles: *Obsessively makes bed*

Dutchman: IT’S STILL RINGING OH PLUMBBOBS MAKE IT STOP.
Cuddles: *still making the bed*

Dutchman: Honey I love you but get out of my way. My ringing phone is making me nauseous and I need to get to the bathroom. I’ll walk through you if I have to.
Cuddles: *oblivious*

She’ll also walk through walls if she has to. Damn that vomit-inducing ringtone!
Some may claim that my ringtone is vomit inducing, but I have to disagree. (also that really is my ringtone, I promise.)

Bear: OH NOES!

Bear: …

Bear: Mr. Ball, I hope you didn’t have to see that.

Bear: You saw, didn’t you. *sigh* Well this is embarrassing.
I WUFFS YOU BEAR.

Dutchman: OH THERE’S THAT DAMN RINGTONE AGAIN, SENDING ME INTO A FRENZY.
Dutchman, there’s nothing ringing, and I think that you’re ignoring the obvious signs here. Remember all of those hints I threw out last chapter?

Dutchman: What could you possibly-

Dutchman: Ooohhhh. Damn it, Cuddles.

He’s doing pretty good in his career, so let’s not damn him just yet. Getting close to that LTW.

Ohai Rags. What are you doing here in your formal wear? What could this possibly mean.

Rags: So, I heard you were having a party. I like parties.
Yup, Cuddles isn’t quite dressed for it yet but it’s party time! Bachelor party time to be more precise. I’d have let Dutchman have a party but she’s in a… fragile condition. XD

The Goopster showed up for the party too. I actually invited every male in the extended family. You should see some familiar faces! 😀

Speaking of fragile conditions…
Dutchman: I guess I shouldn’t be too mad at Cuddles. We’re going to make some pretty babies. 😀
Dutchie, are you sure it’s cool for you to stick around the house? I don’t know if Cuddles would want his pregnant fiancée around during his bachelor party. XD
Dutchman: It’s a big house.
This is true.

Cuddles: Yay, party!
Cuddles, put on some clothes. I know everybody loves you but it just seems weird to show up to your own bachelor party in your underwear. It might make the guests feel… inadequate.

Speaking of guests, you guys already saw that Rags was here. And of course Chip wouldn’t miss this for the world. Also there’s some weird guy in the background. Party crasher? Perhaps. All I know is he isn’t a Derpington and I don’t remember inviting him. XD

And we know it’s not a party until Pat shows up! I don’t think he’s ever even met Cuddles but he just can’t resist the screen time. Isn’t that right, Pat?
Pat: I may be old now but I’ve still got it. I’ve come to show that to the ladies.

Cuddles: So then Herp was all like ‘DEEERRRRP’ and Dina thought it was just hilarious, and that’s how the two of them met in the very first chapter of this legacy.
Ahhhh, memories. :’)

Goopy: Yeah, I’ve heard the story too! And Grandma Dina made a face in retaliation like this!

Goopy: And let’s not forget the time Grandpa Herp snuck up on her from behind, back when they still lived on the lawn. She put his arms up in the air and yelled ‘booga booga booga’ and scared her so bad she impaled herself with the wall!
Stu: (from behind) …dafuq are they talking about…?

Cuddles: Family stories are the best, eh?
Goopy: You’ve got that right!

Well. It’s not a Derpington gathering if silly faces aren’t pulled.

Pat was also pulling silly faces nearby.
Pat: Confounded young people’s contraption! This game is hard!

Pat: Come on, Pat. You can beat this whippersnapper.

It’s true though, the party has been pretty lame up until this point.

Cuddles & Goopy: *too absorbed in old family stories to pay attention to the attractive party dancer*

So she ends up setting up for a routine in the dining room…

And then randomly freaks out for no apparent reason.
And that’s the last we saw of this party dancer.

Not that it didn’t stop this one from arriving and lurking the whole party.

Goopy: Wow, this house has seen quite an improvement since I lived here! What a lovely balcony! 😀
Chip: While my cousin stands on the balcony and leaves the door open like a weirdo, I just want to congratulate you on your upcoming nuptials with my little sister.

Goopy: And just look at this bedroom! What lovely décor!
Cuddles: Oh hey thanks Chip. Means a lot to me that you’re here. In fact…

Cuddles: Ever since that lame party of yours, I’ve been wanting to do this!

Chip: Hey man, be cool, be cool! We can talk about this!

Cuddles: Taste fizzy nectar, dork!

Chip: *laughs* Mercy, mercy! I’ll be sticky for weeks!

Chip: Seriously though, was the party that bad?

Cuddles: Well let’s just say that choosing the interaction “bore to death” is probably not in your best interest the next time you throw a party.
Chip: Point taken.
Cuddles: Hey, who brought the dog?!

Speaking of dogs. XD

Chip: Attention everybody! As this jerk’s best friend, it’s time for me to make a speech about him! Gather around everybody!

Chip: I know you guys all heard this already, but this guy’s going to be marrying my little sister soon! Now, a lot of guys wouldn’t be cool with their best friends being with their little sisters, but I’ll make an exception for this lug.

Chip: Now, I wish he would have waited until after they had gotten married to knock her up, but as Dutchman said earlier, they’ll make really pretty babies so it’s all good.
Cuddles: Right in the feels.

Goopy: Hey wait a minute, I thought you wanted to date him before you found out he was straight Chip? Isn’t this awkward for you?
Chip: Goopy you’re missing the point and making this situation way more awkward than it should have been. Thanks for that.
Goopy: You’re welcome cuz!
Cuddles: Wtf.

Chip: Anyway, I guess what I want to say is congratulations to my best friend and little sister, and that I wish for them to have a great life together. And the next time she gets pregnant, you better be married to her.
Cuddles: Alright, alright, I got it. Married next time.
Pat: Did I miss something?

Chip: You’re a great friend Cuddles, and I’m sure you’ll be a great husband. I mean, if you can suffer through one of my parties, I have no doubts you’ll be fine in the doldrums of marriage.

Cuddles: Hey man, harsh! Haha.
Chip: Mark my words, friend, I’m never getting married. But best of luck to you. XD

Could this be… foreshadowing?!

Pat: Don’t mind me! Just walking by!

I like Chip and feel that he should come and hang out more often.

Chip: Oh, btw, this is payback for knocking my sister up and for spraying me with fizzy nectar.

Cuddles: Woah there, I’m sure we can work this out!

Chip: Yeah how bout no.

D’aww, I love their relationships. Best friends.

Cuddles: Okay so now that you’ve gotten your revenge, can we get back to my party please?

Chip: Sure thing buddy. Although you could wipe that goofy grin off your face, you look a bit silly.
Cuddles: Whatevs. Ladies love the goofy grin.

Pat: Don’t mind me! Just impaling the wall. Oh, and what a lovely balcony!
Like son, like father… XD

Seriously, you’d think this was the party of the century. Dogs, dead dogs, and total strangers were in attendance.

Oh, and I guess Herp thought that it wouldn’t be a party if all of the Derpington men weren’t in attendance, so he showed up too (guess he doesn’t count Leedle as a man).

Herp: There’s cake right?
Sorry hun, no cake. XD Besides, it’d go right through you. Harharhar.

Cuddles: Should I be concerned that Goopy is passed out on my bedroom floor?
Chip: Actually I think that’s an indicator of a good party. Congrats on a job well done.

Cuddles: Should I at least be worried about Rags? I mean, he’s in his underwear!
Chip: Yeah, we might want to look into that…

Pat: So, I hear you’re the blushing bride? Before you settle down for good, might I suggest having a little fun with an older, but beautiful chocolate man?
Dutchman: You’re married to my aunt.
Pat: Point taken.

You look accomplished.
Dutchman: Well, creepy uncle Pat left the room finally and I finished reading my pregnancy book.
You certainly seem excited. I’m not all that excited about the toddler training this will entail in the future, but whatever. XD As long as you’re happy.

STRANGER DANGER.

So, since Dutchman wasn’t having any of it, Pat decided to creep on his youngest niece.

Synchronized dancing with your creepy old uncle ftw.
This has truly been the best party ever. XD (or at least the most hilarious)

Cuddles: Damn it! Who broke the shower?!?!
It was you, Cuddles. Now fix it and clean up your mess.

Cuddles: But it wasn’t me. D:
Hesper: That’ll teach him to not knock up my daughter before marrying her. *grumbles*
Hesper, you can’t complain, you and Leedle had two toddlers before you got married!

Goopy: Hmm. Should I really get in this bunk bed and sleep over my ghostly dead aunt?

Goopy: This situation requires serious pondering.
Hey, seriously, if you people are so tired… why don’t you go home already?! This party has been going on for almost 12 hours!

Looks like those two were having a party on their own. 😉

Yeah, he said he learned his lesson, but obviously, it didn’t happen. XD

Bear: Must… Save… Cuddles… From… BeingboredtodeathbyChip!
Bear to the rescue!

Bear: Actually… I’m just going to hang out here being cute instead.
HE CAN DO NO WRONG. :’)

Dutchie’s got a bump. 😀

Dutchman: (Okay, time to break the news to Cuddles. He’ll be so excited!)

Dutchman: Honey, there’s something we need to talk about.
Cuddles: Oh, hey, you changed outfits. Nice.

Dutchman: Yeah, well, actually, that’s because I’m pregnant!
Cuddles: Yeah, I know!
Dutchman: Wait, what? How?
Cuddles: Hun, your brother and mother both already broke that news to me.

XD

Cuddles: But you know…

Cuddles: …Just because I didn’t get to hear it from you first doesn’t mean I’m not excited! 😀
Dutchman: 😀

So while all of this sappy stuff was going on, Goober was meeting the new neighbor.
Beau: … I like to kick people’s butts.

Goober: Hi! I’m Goober.
Beau: Hi, Goober. I’m going to kick your butt.

Goober: That joke was almost funnier the second time! XD
Beau: No. I mean it.

Run away, Goober! Run away, and never come back!

Except then she turned around.

And laughed at the man who threatened to kick her butt. XD

And then she gossiped with him. 😛 About her sister, no less. XD

And this happened because of Beau moving in. XD I guess Used Napkin is the Lunar Lakes Slayer.

I was having fun having Goober take pictures of everybody, and here’s a shot of one of the poses and backdrops I was using. These two are so cute. :’) I love decorating the house with family pictures like this, it’s so much fun.

Goober: Woo! Party!
She’s happy about the awesome freezer bunny lamp.
Goober: No, it’s my birthday dunce.
Yeah, that too…

Even when she’s derping she’s adorable.

SO… CUTE… *0*

And to complete her strange assortment of traits…

Okay lady, seriously.

THE PARTY HAS BEEN OVER FOR 2 DAYS. GO HOME. *deletes*

How much do you want to bet it was Goopy?

Cuddles and Bear spend some time together. I mean, he’s a dog person, so he should spend time with the little guy. They both get positive moodlets, so it’s a win-win.

Goober now has a job. 😛

Dutchman has been spending her time lazing about, thinking of baby names probably. XD

Well, she looks cute anyway so I’ll let her get away with it.

Plus it’s not like she’s lazy all the time. She paints a lot. And that provides us with some nice decorations and money.

And she’s still writing, too. Although… how “Where’s My Sock?” can be effectively compared to “Effective Luminol Spraying Techniques” is beyond me. XD

Ms. Rebelliouspants Goober wanted a motorcycle, so she got one.

And there’s also this. XD Every time I get one of these Harpy pop-ups, I laugh my ass off. I don’t know why. I just do. And I find it hilarious that the sisters are involved. 😛

The screwballs finally graduated. XD

Of course. XD

Erm, he didn’t graduate but he had to attend the ceremony. 😛

And Dutchman was one of those knocked up teenagers at her graduation I guess. 😛

But at least she got to be the valedictorian.

And these two are doing random things. XD What a funny couple. 😛

Driving home in style. 😛

Except… this isn’t home guys. You only made it a few feet.
Goober: I needed to answer my phone. It could be Beau, you know.
Dutchman: Actually, I’m having contractions I think. D:
Goober: Say what?!

I guess being heavily pregnant and sitting for three hours with a group of her old classmates was too much excitement for Dutchman.

Dutchman: Don’t just stand there! Do something!
Goober: Like what?!

Dutchman: Just take me to the hospital or something!!!

Goober: Oh my plumbbobs I was not prepared for this today!

Goober: And my phone is still ringing! What to do, oh what to do!
Dutchman: You know what, screw it, I’m taking myself.

Goober: Hello, this is Goober! Oh, hey Beau!

Goober: What’s been going on with me? Oh, not much. Just your regular day. Say, want to come over later? I’d love to see you!

Dutchman: Stupid little sister and her stupid phone… *grumble grumble*

Dutchman: Have to do everything for yourself nowadays…

Random Dude: OH MY GOSH!!!!

Random Dude: A FLOATING SHOPPING LIST! AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Random Dude: Kay, I’m over it. What were we talking about again?

And that’s where we’re leaving off. I know, I’m mean. Cliffhanger endings and all that jazz.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the chapter! Thanks everybody for reading, and until next time, happy simming!